Save Yourself

When you hear the phrase, "Save Yourself," or, " Be Your own Hero," what comes to your mind?

What does it mean to you?

Feel free to comment down below. I would love to understand your definition and celebrate victory with you.

I get asked a lot about what it means to save one's self and how one goes about saving themselves.

Like a lot of things in life, we all have different meanings to the words we use and to the things we do. This is why it is important to set intentions before we do anything. This is why when we do healing work on ourselves we need to release all the things we've been conditioned to learn. When we're conditioned to learn and do things, the majority of the time the intention behind it may not align with ours and who we are.

The meaning behind saving yourself and the approaches depends on who you are as an individual, what your situation is, and where you're headed.

Here is my take on "Save Yourself" based on my own experiences:

When I hear this phrase, to me it means being the support I wish I had.

I grew up in a physically, emotionally, and verbally abusive environment. I was raised to be very independent and very considerate so they could rely on me.

I was taught to overgive but undervalued myself. So whenever I felt the need to ask for something or speak up I would feel guilty doing it because I saw it as passing on my burdens to others or becoming one of their burdens.

At one specific moment during those 16 years of depression I once promised to save myself and from there on would repeatedly remind myself that no one was coming to save me. If I had waited I wouldn't have become who I am today.

When I made the promise to save myself. I started with being there for myself. When faced with a tough situation I remind myself that I'll be ok. When I cried myself to sleep I would caress my own head and comfort myself then wipe away my own tears. When negativity overpowered me I would look at myself in the mirror and tell her the words she longed to hear as tears rolled down my face.

By saving myself, I had to accept invisible scars that were imprinted on me by others. I had to embrace it and allow it to help me grow then let it heal as it has taught me to be better. I had to surrender to the fact that I was not always at fault for what had happened to me. I had to forgive others for the harm they had caused me and understand that they didn't know better. This was normal for them.

By saving myself, I had to unlearn and let go of a lot of the things that were harming me instead of helping me. Then I had to set up boundaries that would protect me emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually.

By saving myself, I had to look past all the pains, regrets, and grudges and allow it to inspire me to seek for my true self and to get myself to a better place.

By saving myself I learn to stand strong when I am alone and to speak up when no one is speaking, even during moments when it feels like nobody's listening.

By saving myself, I had to be there for myself when I'm lost and push myself to seek out help when I need it. I had to learn to trust my intuition, even if no one believes in me.

By saving myself I freed myself from all that is harming me and no longer served me, became my best friend, my own hero, my strongest supporter, and my #1 fan.

Becoming my own hero is loving myself - putting myself first and respecting my boundaries. It is understanding that just because we're strong enough to go through something again doesn't mean we should allow ourselves to experience it again. It is not good for us holistically.

My intention is remembering and embracing my authentic self, accepting and understanding our differences, and paying forth the love and kindness of this world in the way I know best as I continue to grow.

_________

Throughout those 16 years a lot of people watched me grow to become the woman I am today but no one actually saw what I went through. Only a few lucky ones actually saw me break down at least once throughout those years. When I broke my silence, at the beginning of my healing journey, did people actually know about my depression. After having healed and now doing the work I do were people inspired.

When we are facing a difficult time it will feel like we're alone. This is a test. A test on our abilities and a test for the ones around us. During tough times like this, we will know who we truly are to ourselves and to those who stayed.

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐝𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬:

To the beautiful souls that stayed and to me,

Thank you for allowing me to grow at my own pace. Thank you for being there for me when I'm lost and need someone the most.

Thank you for staying after watching me phase into so many personalities before deciding on who I am.

Thank you for your guidance, unconditionally love and support.

Thank you for letting me know I still have you when I feel the loneliest.

Thank you for existing.

I am grateful for you. You are my strength and inspiration.